Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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