Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
as a side note pls kill me
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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