I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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