I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
