she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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