My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
