Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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