I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
