After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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