walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
