No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
