Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
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