I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
either way he was missing a nipple.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
