Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
