YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
