At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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