We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Randomize
