Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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