Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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