tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
