Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
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