god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Randomize
