Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize