Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
