I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Randomize
