No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You dont lie about slip and slides
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
And then he peed in my hair
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
