But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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