Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
she woke up with a sticky ear
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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