I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Did we literally take a cab across the street
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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