he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I just gift wrapped bread.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We left an ass print on the piano.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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