you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
