Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
