I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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