my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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