Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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