i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
well most of my day revolves around power hour
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
