Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
