He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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