so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
