He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize