So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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