I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
wow bdsm is so cute
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
