at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
