Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize