"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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