Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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