dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
