Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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