Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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