Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize