No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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