It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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